Social media is a big part of teens’ lives. It helps them stay connected, keeps them entertained and can even be a place to learn. However, it can also present challenges to young people. Cyberbullying, misinformation and comparing themselves to others online can all hurt a teen’s mental health. Social media can also be addictive because likes and follows give a quick rush of excitement, which makes teens want to keep coming back.

Are you worried about how your teen uses social media? Many teens are too. A new Pew Research study found that nearly half of teens (48%) say that platforms like Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook and TikTok mostly have a negative effect on people their age.

With the right guidance, social media can still be a good thing. It can help teens stay connected and express themselves. This guide offers steps for parents, caregivers and caring adults to help teens build healthy social media habits.

Why the Impact of Social Media Matters for Teens

Last year, the U.S. Surgeon General shared a warning about the risks of social media and called for platforms to label their content to help users create and maintain healthy habits. As teen use of social media has gone up, so have serious mental health challenges like depression and even suicide.

Teens often compare themselves to others online—but what they’re seeing isn’t real, nor does it tell the full story.

“It’s so difficult for teens to understand that they’re comparing their lives to others’ lives just through the lens of social media,” said Matt Arnet, Director of Outpatient Services at KVC Kansas. “It’s not a complete picture, and we see so many teens who struggle with this.”

Social media risks include:

• Cyberbullying
• Harassment
• Privacy violations
• Exposure to violence or explicit sexual content
• Misinformation and other age-inappropriate content

These types of posts can cause anxiety, low self-esteem, sleep problems and even put a teen’s safety at risk.

Still, social media isn’t all bad. It can boost creativity, help teens connect with others and teach them new things. The key is helping them use it in a safe and healthy way.

Five Tips to Help Teens Use Social Media Wisely

🧠 Tip #1: Encourage Open Conversations

Erica Herzog

If teens feel judged, they may stay quiet when something bad happens online. Erica Herzog, Director of Outpatient Services with KVC Kansas says, “If your kid feels like they’re being interrogated, they might shut down.” Strict rules can also make teens feel like they need to hide their social media use.

Instead, create time and space for your teen to talk openly. “Approach it with curiosity and an open mind,” Erica says.

Some good conversation starters are:

• What do you like most about social media?
• Did you see anything funny or interesting online today?
• Learn anything cool or surprising?
• Do you ever feel pressure to like or comment on posts from friends, classmates or accounts you follow?
• Have you seen anything online that made you feel uncomfortable? Why did it make you feel that way?
• Do you know who can see your information online? Do you trust them to see your posts?
• Do you know anyone who has struggled with social media?

Important: Before asking questions, first listen and affirm what they share, either in a direct conversation or as they’re talking with their friends. Show them they can trust you and come to you anytime.

🧠 Tip #2: Set Healthy Boundaries Together

Make rules together about when, where and how social media can be used. Talk about:

• Daily screen time limits (How much time feels healthy and balanced?)
• Which apps or platforms are okay to use (Be specific!)
• What kind of online behavior is helpful or harmful
• How to protect their privacy, including how you’ll monitor their online activity to make sure they’re safe

If you notice your teen acting unkind online or viewing upsetting content, Matt suggests asking: If someone you know was over at our house talking like that, would you be okay with it? “Most of the time, the answer is no,” said Matt.

🧠 Tip #3: Teach Digital Literacy and Critical Thinking

Digital literacy means knowing how to spot lies (misinformation), harmful content or pressure online. Knowing how to spot these things will help teens be smart social media users.

How can you help teens sort out the truth online? You can coach teens by:

• Reminding them that social media companies want to keep them online longer
• Explaining how the algorithm works (it shows more of what you like, comment on and engage with)
• Teaching them to fact-check posts, videos or articles before sharing them or accepting them as truth
• Talking about how influencers may be paid to promote things, even if they don’t label it with #ad or #partner post
• Encouraging them to report any harmful, untrue or fake content
• Showing them how to protect their personal info

Bonus tip: Algorithms can create an “echo chamber” by showing only one point of view or by showing content about a specific person or ideology over and over again. Help or encourage your teen to follow different types of accounts to see new ideas and avoid narrow thinking.

🧠 Tip #4: Model Healthy Social Media Habits

Believe it or not, your teen watches how you use your phone. Show them what good social media habits look like.

• Take breaks from your phone during meals or family time
• Use social media to support good causes or learn new things
• Talk about what you see online and how you handle it

Putting down your phone can be hard. We get it! But if you show your teen that you can do it, they’ll feel like they can too.

🧠 Tip #5: Monitor with Trust and Respect

Parental controls can help, but don’t overdo it. Teens still need room to grow and build trust. In most cases, it’s best to avoid excessive, micromanaging surveillance and do simple things like:

• Being open about any monitoring tools or apps you use
• Friending or following your teen online instead of spying
• Making sure they understand this is about keeping them safe, not controlling their actions

Transparency builds trust!

When to Get Help for Your Teen

Social media isn’t always bad. Nor is it often the sole cause of mental health struggles, but it can make things worse. Watch for these signs:

• No longer enjoying offline activities they used to enjoy (think sports, hobbies, extracurriculars, etc.)
• Always checking for new notifications or obsessing over likes/follows
• Getting angry when asked to log off
• Hiding or lying about what they’re doing online and on social media

If you’re concerned, talk to your teen about therapy or support they may need. Download this guide to understand if your teen may need support from a mental health professional.

Want to Help More Teens?

If you care about helping youth with challenges like social media and mental health, you could be a great fit at KVC Kansas! Visit kvc.org/careers to learn more about our job opportunities for therapists, clinicians and other mental health professionals.