Have you ever heard the saying, “it takes a village to raise a child?” For children, teens and families experiencing foster care, this village is more than just a phrase. It’s a lifeline. Every act of kindness, no matter how small, creates a ripple of support that changes lives, both now and for the future. Ready to be part of that village and make a real difference? Here’s how you can support youth in foster care living in your community.

Put Yourself in Their Shoes

Imagine being a child or teen, when a family crisis or a concern about your safety leads a judge to rule that foster care is the best option to keep you safe. How would you feel? Confused, anxious, angry, sad? Maybe all of the above? For more than 390,000 children and teens in foster care across the country, this is their reality. They’re experiencing some of life’s hardest moments, and while foster care is meant to keep them safe, it’s also complex and deeply emotional.

These young people need caregivers who will stand by them through it all. They need dedicated child welfare and mental health professionals who can help them and their families safely reunite. Most of all, they need their community to show up and make them feel seen, supported and like they truly belong.

How to Support Youth in Foster Care

Every child and teen in foster care has their own story, but one thing is certain: the support of caring communities can mean the world. Keep reading to find out how you can support youth in foster care so they feel empowered and less alone.

As a Biological Parent

Gabriella and her family

“If you have that strong love for your kid, you’re going to do what it takes! That’s what it’s about,” says Gabriella, who reunified with her son after foster care.

The best thing you can do? Work closely with your case manager and the relatives, kinship caregivers or foster parents who are caring for your children. It’s not always easy, but remember, you all are working toward the same goal: safe reunification and bringing your family back together.

Here are some more tips:

1. Lean on your case manager and family support worker (FSW) for help. They can connect you with resources in your community to support you, whether it’s with substance use, finances or other challenges you’re facing.

2. Do your best to keep a good relationship with your child’s caregivers or foster parents. We know it’s not always easy, but when your child sees you and their caregivers working together, it helps them feel more secure and supported.

3. Stay connected to your child in creative ways, like asking your case manager if you can set up regular video or phone calls.

4. Keep an open mind and accept support when it’s offered. Things might not always go smoothly, but be honest and stay focused on doing what’s best for your child, your family and yourself.

“If you’re a parent going through this, the last thing you want to tell anyone is that you’re still struggling, which stunts your growth and your ability to ask for help,” Gabriella says. “But asking for help is your superpower!”

As a Relative or Non-Related Kinship Caregiver

As a relative, whether you’re a grandparent, aunt, uncle or cousin, or a non-related kinship caregiver like a teacher, neighbor or family friend, you’re often one of the people children and teens in foster care already trust and feel comfortable with. Your familiar face can offer them a much-needed sense of stability during a very confusing time.

As a kinship caregiver, you ensure they go to school, eat regularly, take care of their health and receive the love and support they need to thrive. And the connection you already share with the child or teen adds an extra layer of comfort and stability, helping them feel secure and supported.
Here are a few more ways you can support youth in foster care as a relative or kinship caregiver:

1. Keep communication open. Talk with the child or teen about their feelings and help them express what they need.

2. Stay involved with their case. Work with their case manager, therapist and other support professionals to stay updated on what’s going on and anything needed for their care.

3. Be patient and understanding. Youth in foster care may act out or struggle with emotional challenges. Offering a calm, understanding environment can help them feel supported.

4. Encourage connection with siblings. If they have siblings in care, help maintain their relationship through visits, phone calls, or other ways of staying connected.

At KVC, our kinship team works hard to keep children and teens in their home communities surrounded by people they know and trust.

“Our top priority is siblings and relatives,” says Carley, KVC Kansas Permanency Supervisor. “If siblings can be kept together, that will always take priority. After that, it’s finding relatives who are willing. This helps maintain some sense of normalcy and familiarity in a very difficult situation.”

As a Current Foster Parent

Bella (name changed to protect their privacy), who experienced foster care as a teenager, shares her story: “Being placed in a new family is already really hard. You’re entering an existing family dynamic where everyone knows each other, and you’re the new person. People can tell you’re the foster kid because you haven’t been around for the past 12 years. That makes the transition even harder because many foster kids already carry a sense of shame.”

The truth is every child and teen in foster care needs more than just a roof over their head. Here are some ways you can support youth in foster care as a foster parent:

1. Help them stay connected with their cultural roots. Celebrate holidays important to them, take them to cultural events that celebrate their heritage, and introduce them to movies and books that reflect their cultural background.

2. Learn to care for their unique needs. This might include things like understanding textured hair care, helping them with self-care routines or understanding how to address mental health needs.

3. Be accepting and supportive of all backgrounds. This includes embracing youth who identify as LGBTQIA+.

4. Avoid empty comfort phrases. Saying things like “it will get better” or “everything happens for a reason” can minimize their emotions. Instead, actively listen when they talk to you and acknowledge their feelings.

5. Help siblings stay connected. If a child or teen in your care has a sibling living with a relative, kinship caregiver, or a different foster parent, ask the youth’s case manager if you can arrange sibling visits, even if it’s just for a night or two.

6. Stay in touch with biological parents. Regularly communicate with the child or teen’s biological parents, sharing updates, photos and stories.

As a Teacher or School Professional

Experiencing foster care affects more than just a child or teen’s home life. It can impact their sense of stability and ability to focus on school, too. Experiencing foster care affects more than just a child’s home life.

“It’s more than just who’s caring for you,” says Mary, a KVC Kansas case manager. “It’s environmental changes.”

Here’s how teachers, principals, counselors and other school professionals can support youth in foster as a teacher or school professional:

1. Consider becoming a kinship caregiver. If you know a student in foster care who needs a stable place to stay, being a kinship caregiver could make a world of difference.

2. Show patience and understanding. Youth in foster care may struggle to keep up with assignments or adjust to routines. Giving them extensions or offering extra school support can help take some of the pressure off.

3. Help them catch up on missing credits or assignments. Children and teens in foster care may struggle in school due to frequent school moves. Check in with them or their caregivers and offer help catching up, so they don’t fall behind.

4. Offer after-school tutoring. Some students in foster care may struggle to focus during class or need extra help outside school hours. Offering tutoring or additional support can give them the chance to catch up and succeed.

As a Peer or Friend

If you learn that a friend or classmate is in foster care, the best thing you can do is be a friend! 

Bella recalled how difficult it was any time she had to tell someone what was going on. “It’s tough having to explain your situation to friends or feeling like you have to do that in every area of your life. It becomes exhausting.” 

Rather than trying to ask questions and learn about the situation, find ways you can help and support your friend or classmate without prying into things they might not want to talk about.

1. Invite them over to hang out! Head to the park, go to the movies or join a sport together – the options are endless.

2. Ask to study, or share your notes from any classes they missed.

3. Sit with them at lunch!

4. Offer to drive them to school or extracurriculars or, if you don’t have your license, ask your parents if they’re willing to help.

5. Treat them with the same respect and kindness you would treat any other friend or classmate.

As a Caring Community Member

“People often overlook the fact that sometimes these kids need someone completely involved with them,” says Carley. “They don’t necessarily need an advocate in the courtroom. Sometimes they just need somebody to give them a ride and be a friend.”

Here are some ideas for how caring adults can support youth in foster care:

• Donate to or volunteer with KVC Kansas.
• Volunteer with community support groups designed to help youth in foster care. Many local churches have foster care ministries that you can join.
• Teach youth in foster care important life skills (making appointments, budgeting, cooking, cleaning, etc.)
• Consider signing up for CarePortal, a platform KVC Kansas partners with to meet the needs of those we serve.
• And of course, become a foster parent!

Become a Foster Parent

There’s a child or teen who needs someone just like YOU – and at KVC Kansas, we make sure the opportunity to foster is open to all people. You can foster a child or teen at any stage of life, regardless of your relationship status, gender identity, income level or where you live. What matters most is how much you care. We have options that work in your life, right where you are – for exactly who you are.

Foster parents provide a safe, loving environment. It’s a meaningful opportunity to find personal fulfillment as you show a child or teen the love and care they deserve, teach them life skills and give them support. You will experience joy and discover a greater sense of purpose in life.

So, do you have the heart to foster a child or teen? Say yes, and we will support you every step of the way.